


I just worry

by Captain_jack_harkness



Category: All Time Low, Bandom, hustlers - Fandom
Genre: Alex is stressed, Blood, Fluff, Friendship, Jack is in love, Jack just thinks so, M/M, Requested, Secrets, Self Harm, Tour, alex don’t realise, but it’s not self harm, friendship fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-26 04:00:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13849632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Captain_jack_harkness/pseuds/Captain_jack_harkness
Summary: “Hey!I saw your Alex being sick - jack thinks he has an eating disorder-fic. It was great!Do you think you could do one similiar but with self-harming. Like lexi accidentaly cuts himself on something and the others think he did it on purpose... I dont know i think it could be a nice one :)”





	I just worry

**Author's Note:**

> I forgot I never published this I’m so sorry. Request things in the comments I’m usually better than this.

“For fuck sake.” I yell slamming the now empty glass down on the table I was sitting at causing it to smash, “Fuck.”

I can’t deal with writing music right now, I’m just not in the right headspace. I can’t put my thoughts on paper. I look down at the broken glass and the songs I’ve been failing to write to see that somehow I cut open my wrist when I smashed the glass. Blood was pouring out my my arm and onto the table. 

“Fuck.” 

Nothing is going right today. I stand up and run my my arm under the tap to make sure their wasn’t any glass left in the wound and hopefully calm the blood flow. It didn’t help. Pressure. I need to put pressure on it. I held only my arm but the blood kept coming. After about five minuets of constant pressure the blood flow started to slow enough for me to to let go. Not longer after that it was almost completely stopped. I need to clean up the glass. I wrap my hand in tissue so I don’t cut myself anymore on the broken glass. Once it’s all in the bin I soak as much of the blood up as I can with tissue before cleaning the rest up with a sponge. When I’m done it looks like nothing happened other than the blood stains on my song book and the massive cut on my arm that’s sure to scar. 

God knows how I’m going to hide this one. 

I’m always hiding my stupid little injury’s from the guys because they only worry too much. Especially Jack, every little thing he fusses over and it’s really annoying. If I say I’m fine that means I’m fine. It’s nice that he cares but sometimes he cares too much. They are all coming over tomorrow before tour starts so I’m somehow going to have to hide my injury long enough until it’s healing and nobody would worry anymore. I’m perfectly fine I’m just frustrated that I want to get a head start on writing but I can’t put my thoughts down on paper. 

I wrap up my arm in a bandage and decide to worry about how I’m going to hide it from the boys tomorrow. 

~

Everything goes fine the next day, I get showered and change the bandage over before everyone shows up. I pulled a hoodie on over my head just as the doorbell rings. Rian was the first to show up doesn’t notice a thing. Not long after Zack does he also doesn’t say anything my long sleeves. Jack shows up last a hour late but with pizza, he also says nothing about the sleeves. Why would they? I’m just wearing a jumper. I should stop worrying. Tour starts soon and we are getting on the plane tomorrow and that’s when I’m going to have to worry.

The day went smoothly and they didn’t notice a thing, we watched movies, chatted and got drunk, that night Jack and Rian crashed on the couch while Zack took the spare bedroom. I went to sleep in my room not needing to worry about anyone worrying about me.

The next morning I take off the bandage and inspect the wound, it’s healing nicely considering it was pretty bad when I cut it. I was scared I was going to need stitches but I was probably freaked out over the amount of blood their was. I run my finger over the raised cut just to feel what it was like. I should probably bandage this back up so I don’t accidentally knock or scratch it open. I’ll do it after my shower. 

Getting in the shower I have the water on too hot letting it burn my back, it wasn’t quite burning me but it was uncomfortably hot. Every time I tried to add cold water it just got too cold, I would rather be too hot than freezing cold so that’s how I stayed. In the too hot shower just forgetting all the stress of song writing and tour, maybe I should write something shit just to get something on paper. It don’t matter if nothing makes sense. Maybe it would help me having some progress, just having something on paper to show I’ve done something. Maybe that’s what I need. 

I was content with staying in the shower clearing my head but Jack started banging on the bathroom door threatening to piss in my sink if I didn’t get out the shower in the next thirty seconds. I sigh in annoyance just wanting to relax but I know Jack wasn’t kidding, at least he was being considerate and wasn’t threatening to pee on my bed. I turn off the shower and step out. 

“Give me a minute.” I call wrapping a towel around my body, when I unlock the door he’s standing their impatiently, “All yours.”

“What’s on your arm?” He asked and I looked down at my wrist where the glass cut my wrist, “Alex what did you do?”

“I got frustrated and smashed a glass when writing songs and it cut me.” I shrug hoping that Jack isn’t going to overreact. 

“Alex...” Jack trailed off not believing me, I knew he wouldn’t, he always worries too much, “You can always talk to us.”

“Knew you wouldn’t believe me.” Jack runs his finger over the cut and I shiver, I don’t like that feeling, “That’s why I didn’t tell you because you worry too much.”

“Because you’re my friend.”

“And as my friend you have to believe me.” I tell him before walking off, he’s not going to believe me, he worries too much I’m just hoping he realises soon that I’m not lying to him. 

~~

“Alex we need to talk.” Jack pushes open my door, I was in the middle of finishing packing for tour and I really can’t be bothered to deal with this right now. 

“Yes Jack.” I huff throwing a shirt across the room. 

“We need to talk about that.” Jack pointed to my now bandaged up arm. 

“Go through my bin you will find smashed glass.” Jack going on about this is really annoying me, I know he means well but this is getting dumb now, “Also you saw the cut do you really think I would purposely cut where everyone can see. What would the fans think?”

“I guess.” Jack admitted, “I worry about you.”

“I know.”

“Your my best friend and I love you Alex I just don’t want to see you hurt.” I throw a top I wasn’t planning on taking with me at Jack, “You understand that right?”

“Yes Jack.” I roll my eyes, of course I know that, Jack’s my best friend I just think he worries more than most people.


End file.
